When:Thirstday, Dec 22, 2011 @ 7PM, on out at 7:30.
Where: The Lockdown (1024 N Western Ave)
Hares: Wang Chucks & Ass2Mouth
Why: Because once every so often a kennel does something so stupid that the entirety of its internal organs get shut down.
Hash Cash: $8
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A Message from the Hares:
This year, the Thirstday Hash House Harriers are completely mailing it in to provide you with a truly forgettable hashing experience in celebration of the Great Thirstday Anthrax Spoof & Jimmy Hat Run. Working in conjunction with nobody in particular, the TH3 is embarassed to present one evening, three trails, and (at least) one botched naming.
Bimbos and wankers, take you pick between any of the three concurrent trails!
Trail #1: The Ballbuster trail
Thursday, Dec 22, 2011 – 7pm HST
In the spirit of the r*cists at TH3, this will be a long, pavement-pounding trail with very few marks. Actually, there will be no marks at all. Just print out the map linked below and r*n the 7.5 miles. FRB on this trail will be acknowledged with the first slap slot of the evening.
Trail map: http://g.co/maps/6tywm
Trail #2: The Turkey trail
Thursday, Dec 22, 2011 – 7pm HST
This 3-5 mile trail will feature checks, splits, a backcheck or two, a beer check, and (weather permitting) an outdoor circle. (Hashers on trails #1 and #3 will be notified of circle location at the appropriate time.)
Trial #3: The “Wanging it” trail
Thursday, Dec 22, 2011 – 7pm HST
You’ll probably want a few extra bucks in your pocket on this trail, as it involves sitting at the bar and drinking heavily while the rest of the pack is out getting lost and angry. Take special note that the Lockdown has 1/2 off all draft beers in honor of the Great Thirstday Anthrax Spoof & Jimmy Hat Run–but only on Thirstdays.
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Trail notes:
1. The Lockdown (1024 N Western Ave, http://www.lockdownbar.com/) is a heavy metal bar. With heavy metal concerts playing on the TVs. From bands like Anthrax. Get it?
2. Your hares for the evening will be Ass 2 Mouth and Wang Chunks.
3. The hares are eager to introduce any willing victims to the next bad idea in Chicago area hashing–the Bear Fight. Urban Dictionary has two entries for “Bear Fight”. The hares aren’t letting on about which “Bear Fight” you’ll see on Thirstday. Either way, bring a few extra bucks if you’d like to try it out.
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=bear+fight
4. Hash cash is $8. Like almost every other TH3 trail.
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P.S.: We have openings for hares starting 1/26/12! Dust off your calendar and see WJew-40 to sign up, or e-mail WJew-40 at jgbaggins@aol.com! Don’t forget to sign up for your birthday in advance!
P.S.S.: Upcoming hares, if you have found a location for your previously-TBD hash, e-mail the details to WJew-40 to get the website updated.
Upcumming Th3 Hashes:
12/29/11 Taste the Rainbow – Gambler’s (4908 N Pulaski Rd)
01/5/12 Just Hattie & Happy Ass Grabber – TBD
01/12/12 10 Dix with Wings & Furry Spice - The Cell Block (3702 N Halsted)
01/19/12 WJew-40 – TBD
01/26/12 WE NEED A HARE
02/02/12 WE NEED A HARE
02/09/12 WTMJ & Sphincter Grease – TBD (Homecoming Hash)
02/16/12 WE NEED A HARE
02/23/12 WE NEED A HARE
